New Beginning, Cold End

Meeting him is like the first breath of crisp air in the spring in your lungs. No longer freezing cold air that feels like a million needle points in your lungs. Not yet the suffocating humid air of the summertime.

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You walk into a bar one night, a girl's night out. Chatting away the night like you don't both work tomorrow. A few drinks in and a handsome slightly older man sits next to you. Good with his words, a charming smile.

The night goes on; he sweeps you away like a knight on his white horse. Nights spent texting, days spent texting. He's so charming. Waking up to "good morning" texts. He asks about your day.

First date:

A restaurant. Could you be more awkward? Just sit down he's right there. You sit down. Words feel like liquid rubber coming out your mouth. What are you even saying? What is he saying? You're so nervous, but the tingles feel like little fairies jumping all over your skin, and Teletubbies in your tummy. It's so uncomfortable but yet so comforting.

Next a movie. 10 minutes in; is he going to hold your hand? Should you grab his? He grabs yours, slowly caressing your hand during the whole movie. What was the movie even about? You don't know. The tingles spread through your body head to toe. You feel warm. He takes you home. Will he kiss you? No. He's gentlemen. Comforting.

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Second date:

Who cares about the date? Let's skip to the end. When you invite him home for a movie, hoping for some more time with him. He pushes you against the wall, kissing you slowly. Pick a movie. Movie picked. What's the movie? No clue. His lips locked on yours the world is spinning. Did the sun get closer? You're steaming.

But this isn't who you are anymore. This wasn't supposed to happen so soon. He doesn't want to wait. Can't control himself enough to stay for the movie. Again, what movie? Who's even watching? Not him. He holds you in his arms, comforting only a moment ago, now unsettling. He leaves and you await his text though you know how it should end. Know how it will end. I suppose, you know how it did end, right in that moment. Once was a fresh start, a new beginning, a hot flame...Now nothing more in your mind than yet another cold end.