Rifki Gee

A long way from home

Searching

Walking along dirt roads

Sailing across oceans

He never knew what's coming

He only knew what he left behind

Without his parents

Without his friends

Without anyone

He finds himself in a new land

Where he is met with scowls

Frowns, disdain, rejection

They speak in tongue

He does not understand

Everywhere he turns

Everyone he meets

No one spares him a glance

He spends days and nights

Walking

Wandering

Wondering

Where could he go?

Who can he turn to?

His days become daydreams

His steps are of constant rhythm

He is a walking nobody

He finally comes to a place

Where a door is open, and he enters

He finds golden silence

Where people look inwardly

Rather than outwardly

He was never met with a scowl

As everyone bowed their heads

Like him

He finally finds a place

He is finally accepted

He can finally rest

Rifki Gee found a place to live

Where old men gave him food

Without fail, three times a day

This was his safe haven

Amidst this place where he knew no one

Understood no one

In a place where he wasn't able to do anything

He stands ever straighter now

This is not the end of Rifki Gee in this unknown land

This is only the start of his pursuit

To happiness

Sometimes I wonder a little something

Why are some people born blind?

Why are some countries in war?

Why do governments feel the need to corrupt?

Why am I here?

Sometimes I think of a little something

That all the things I have done

And experienced to get to where I am

Is for a reason; something bigger than now

That somehow I am destined for something

A little something I don’t know about yet

Sometimes I remember a little something

Something someone did to get me to where I am

Someone who saw my naivety and questions

And saw that little destiny in me

That someone, watching me from afar,

Constantly like a guardian angel

Help guided me to where I am now

For which I am inherently grateful

Sometimes I write about a little something

Something that lets my story bleed onto pages

Something that is universal and yet so personal

A little something about my life

Of which I am sure

Is not little.

#poem #life #thoughts

Downpour on the grey pavement, and the clicks of her heels. She didn't bring an umbrella, but she didn't walk more hastily. In fact, her steps were slower.

I watched her from my car. No, not watched. Stared. I stared at her from my car. I observed her. I saw the dark bags under her eyes. I saw the swelling around them.

I knew she hadn't slept since that day. I hadn't either.

She didn't see me, but I saw her. I saw through her. Through to the very specks of dust that she was made of. Through to the very dull sound of her heart beating. The heart that still beats with mine. Oh darling, what have I done to you?

Suddenly, she took off her heels and sat down on a bench nearby. She threw her bag on the space beside her and she buried her face in her hands. In the rain. Drenched. Cold. Oh baby, did I really get too far?

Her hair was drenched, though I presume it was in a messy bun before. Her lavender dress was soaked. I bought that dress for her out of the many gifts I've given. She said it was her favorite. Oh love, is this where the fire dies?

I continue watching her from the car. Wishing I could go out there and say something. Wishing I could go out there and feel her still in my arms. Yet, I couldn't will myself to do so.

She will move on. She will be nothing to me. She will only be a memory.

Oh rain, you temptress. Your tears are like mine. Numerous before it slowly vanishes. 

I watch her again from my car. No, not watched. Stared. I stared at her from my car. 

Goodbye. I drove away.

A halo of light lingered above her head

She put herself on a masquerade, disguised

Jovial she looked, devastated she felt

Hiding cards and rolling the dice

What is sin?

What is hatred

What is forgiveness?

Shadows of doubt led her in a dance

Shutting eyes of heart, opening eyes of mind

If only what she saw was kind

She would no longer look askance 

What is romance?

Where is romance?

Which is romance?

Alas! if she knew, she'd be saved

As wings enveloped her broken soul

Soaring higher than the world's praised

Till she was dropped and shattered again

Words that should have been spoken are now lost

As the invisible clock ticks and chimes

If the bridge falls, how does one get across?

One could only mourn the end of their prime

All that is left are etches on paper

Of the tints and shade of memories old

No one could ask for something much greater

When there is a blanket to warm the cold

Who would want to lick frost off the windows?

For it stabs and burns the tongue with blue flames

Should we uncover the dead man's heroes?

No, for we tamper with history's veins

Yet, love is love is love will not vanish

As it surrenders all to its madness

The sun goes down over one horizon

It's never torn between two options

Struck to the fear of nothing and silence

But it could never follow its conscience

Blue eyes, green eyes, which pair?

To which shall my heart and soul desire?

To which does my body feel a flare?

To which does my heart beat with fire?

Blue eyes comes with a choir and symphony

His stance straight and his mind bright

They sing like angels so brilliantly

His hand awaits to take me through the night

Green eyes is a one-man show of a solo

Though confident, he is still so meek

His actions speak more than his words aglow

When I'm with him, I finally could speak

Both promise oaths worth much more than gold

Alas, one could not choose the both of them

For a heart could never be halved and sold

Oh God, without at least one what shall I become?

It was dark and grey

As the rain poured down

If there was a better day

Though it could not be found

Pitter patters started to slow

As the sun shone through

It wasn't the end, though

From what I knew

Light shone and it was good

At that, I found the wrongs

Sins done behind a hood

I was a singer without a song

But lo! The fog clears further

And I saw the world for itself

It isn't worth to murder

Like I saw myself

I looked beyond that and saw you

Eyes of blue and I remember

The day when we first met without clues

The breezy night of December

If there was such a thing as God

Then I saw God and met him

Who loved me though I'm flawed

And loved me though I've sinned

For you've waited for me all the days

When I haven't been sleeping by your side

Those days have been a haze

Filled with tears and pride

Your arms are wide open and I run

Soon I'm enveloped in your love

That is brighter than the sun

You truly are a gift from above

As you whisper sweet nothings to my ear

Holding me closer and I no longer suffer

Now I shall have no fear

For you are my eternal lover

Rose between your lips

Our bodies are in sync

Your scent is a nectar I sip

I fell for you in a blink

Flames rushing in reds

We don't have much time

I wish the night wouldn't end

So we can finish this silent crime

The candles start to dim

My heart starts to pound

As we commit this sin

Trying to make no sound

Sweat trails down your face

Glimmering drops in the dark

As you increase the pace

Leaving behind a mark

By the end, you smother me

With a kiss and two more

I fall into a deep sea

Only you I will ever adore

Alas, we've become like Icarus

As the sun has come so close

If only there was deliverance

So we could stay in our throes

Today, I must leave so abrupt

To my betrothed without a name

Don't fret though, my love

For I will return without shame

Damn the ring, I'll stay

For love is worth more than silver

We will last for universe of days

Till death becomes the winner