I was 11. 

I knew just enough to know better

With antics and mischief that made me 

The pride of my classmates 

And the misery of my teachers. 

My parents were arguing that night in front of the TV

With a half-eaten pizza on the counter 

Next to an empty bottle. 

The scene was set as it always was these days. 

This time, the argument didn't end with broken plates and raised voices

But my dad slamming the front door and my mom's tears on the carpet. 

I somehow knew that he wasn't coming back. 

Hating him would have been so easy. 

Unleashing my anger on him felt so natural, so right, so fitting. 

I felt it grow in me, a tiger growling and scratching at the bars of its cage. 

But I knew I had to forgive and move on 

Even though that sentence sounded as impossible then as it does now. 

But for my future 

For my sanity 

For my mom 

I had to make a choice. 

Fifteen steps down

To the right. 

Fourteen more 

To the left. 

The light itself lingers at the top tread

For fear it will not be able to return. 

Down

          Down

                     Down 

                               Til the air thickens in your chest. 

Darkness is all that dwells here. 

And your escape is a forgotten dream. 

Trapped in blind silence and deathly peace 

Your eternal end

A living tomb. 

Life can be a messy kitchen. 

While you are running around cooking 

Be careful to avoid the spilled orange juice 

It stains. 

Burnt ovens are just the smell of trying

Open a window and let the past go out with the smoke 

Failure bakes a delicious soufflé.

Wipe your brow on your apron or shirt 

It'll all come out in the wash, right? 

Burned fingers and soiled sleeves are the secret ingredient 

You realize your parents were right. 

Serve your result on the chipped and cracked plates 

And garnish it all with a smile. 

It was early summer, and it had been exactly 4 months since I had seen her. The rainy morning mist failed to squelch what was in my heart, the glorious anticipation of seeing her again. I waited at the airport, butterflies in my stomach and a nervous smile on my face. Her flight was due in twenty minutes, which seemed like both an eternity and a second to me. Before I knew it, she had touched down and the flight was disembarking. A bouquet of flowers in my hand, I stopped my anxious pacing and looked expectantly at the long hallway of the airport gate. 

Then I saw her, radiant and beautiful, just I had remembered her in my dreams. We both ran quickly towards each other, and I wrapped her in my embrace. The light had burned away the morning mist, and all was right with the world. She was home.