To Death

It was all so easy and then I fell,

From supple limbs to bones I must quell

Heavy I arrive at the place we meet,

Unwanted friend I now beseech

To Healers

To the Lords and spirits to whom we pray,

In wails and whispers where our dead lay

To those whose ears mend weary hearts,

And those whose tireless hands play God,

Thank you for the strength your solace brought

After all the battles had been fought

Thank you for hope, for tears, for hours spent

Helping the ailing from darkness fend

To Dearest Ones

To those of you who’ve loved me most,

It is time I meet those wayward ghosts

Farewell friends, I leave you this,

To have seen joy and woe from the abyss

The greatest love, the deepest pain

To know this life was not in vain

You now know the breadth of beauty

You now know the depths of bane

And to My Love

When the rain falls,

and you are without shelter

You’ll neither bury your head,

or advance helter-skelter

You’ll rise to the occasion,

as you have before

And that fiercest of storms,

you will endure

Because you know it is a passing trial

That will turn its cheek and undo its wile

You my bravest, my heart, my light

Its my turn now, to see you through the night

Thank you

Love wholly. Believe deeply,

Whether aged or however briefly

Consume all of this life, bitter and fond

As I seek to find comfort in the great beyond

No longer hasten to bid me adieu,

The Blue will bless this life anew.

Filthy fingers, bring me back.

Many miles gone,

And here I am again.

Very un-princess-like

Standing in your carriage,

Loose bolts, steel and heat,

Raging beneath my feet.

Gritty heat of summer,

Flushing Queens stand,

Hanging on with the rest.

One thousand sweaty hands

Flesh on metal claws press,

Against your shiny limbs.

On the 7, it was no heaven.

Hundreds of miles away

And dirt-damp fingers bring me back.

Elbowed into your tin box

Our motley crew exhales

A collective swear when you brake,

Too soon mothers, vagrants,

Murderers, and babies yawn.

The colors of Corona,

Flash by my sleep-filled eyes,

As Warhol waves to Basquiat

On a dust-caked landscape.

The air, your morning breath

Scents my A.M. mind reject,

The Big Apple, forgot about us.

If you take me there,

I'll make it anywhere?

I thought I was riding shotgun

On your gnarled rails,

Through that urban thicket

But I hopped off

'Cause I was wrong.

Rumble on through

You squeal like you’ve had enough.

I feel your pain old friend

I thought I got off too,

But it was premature.

Just a passenger,

Between here and there.

Tied to you, for better or worse,

How deep your rickety machine roars

Angry, but you keep coming back for more

Ten thousand miles away,

No sleep till...

The smell of piss and metal,

Brings me back to you once more.

I live here with her. She feeds me

Breakfast, lunch and dinner

And my head, I am well fed

Processed foods, canned lies, artificial flavors

Let me know I am loved

She TELLS me I am

I keep roaming, because I am a child

     Like her

I love to roam and find things

I am looking for her now

And I know he is there, somewhere

But I am looking for him too

She’s hidden him from me

Why? He is my face

In the mirror, it’s him!

He’s kind, I like him

I miss him but I’m not allowed

     To know him, is not allowed

She keeps me dizzy, it’s fun

Like a roller coaster

She tells me its fun, she always tells me

But I know there has to be an off

I feel sick with tummy hurts

The candy, the sweet lies

The cotton, that floss in cherry pink

The baby you made me, stay

My ‘blankie’ I need it to sleep

I don't want it anymore 

But she tells me I do

She tells me to smile

I have to

     Smile, because you are on camera

     Smile, you are the BEST

     Smile, for him because you’re here 

     With me, you’re happy

He doesn’t love you

She tells me

But my smarts tell me

He got off the roller coaster

And he got a little lost looking for me

But he is here, in my hands

In my eyes, when I am allowed

To look, I see

But she keeps me warm, too warm

I am hot, like him

She doesn’t know how hot

She just holds the blanket

Tighter, around me is her love

She tells me so many times

This is her love, our love

She tells me, I can’t live without her

But now she’s angry, and I can’t make

Her Happy. I want to but I can’t 

She does not look at me

Now, I am annoying her

I am in the way, she needs to run

Away, she runs but she comes back

And I am her precious again

Relief, I think

But I can’t think

I’m not allowed thinks

I try, but mom tells me, I’m not allowed

Your mom is precious remind them

There is no you without me

Smile! This is to show them son

How happy we are

Show who?

Don’t talk back

Show him?

He doesn’t exist

It’s all for you, she tells me…

All those years ago

I lost it when no was watching

No one knew, there was no ceremony

No one said, “hey lady, stop that!”

She didn’t touch me in a bad way

I have no horror story to tell

Making her look good

Made me a good boy

And so I did it

And so to a narcissist

I lost

Me, a forever baby

Because I listened

I am a good boy

Because I stayed

I cannot be blamed

As long as I stay, it’s not my fault

So I stay, so I can claim nothing

All those years ago

And I am still innocent

But I lost Something, some time ago

And no one knows

It began with her

And they’ll never know

Because she smiles

Smile! Thatta boy

She who is now in her years

And me a man-child

Who doesn’t know how

Together we sit, we snort laugh and fart and make prank calls

And she is happy

Dr. Orenthis heard a soft knock from inside the closet. His senses were heightened. But he had just murdered someone so that was no surprise. He warned his lab partner not to be so brazen with the modified RIG injections. It was a slight chance, but it was possible it would do what they were both afraid of. Killing him was the protocol they had decided upon. But there was a noise. A grumbling. The doctor turned the door handle with what should have been avertible caution. The brilliant Ursus pathologist Martin Fritz was dead; or was he something else?