holding him up
awoken
panicked whispers
"dad... car... hospital... now."
13? my memory doesn't serve me
pulling my the innocents out of bed
car
mom stricken by shock
uncertain how she managed the drive downtown
endless halls
carrying a sleeping Odin
hearding a drowsy Noni
voice slurred by poisons
his own and theirs
tongue out
displaying the gouge to me
centimeter more
it would've been gone
tooth marks embedded
lacking permission
rushing down the hall
unstoppable
following
ashamed and horrified
this monster
my father
woman tied to a stretcher
eyes meet
screeches echo
glimpsing his insanity in her gaze
innocence
truly gone
Mothers are meant to love forever. Unconditionally. Without payment. Yet in my household there came that time when Love required gifts, favours, acts of gratitude. And they were hardly returned with Love.
That moment when meals require prior thought and planning. Gestures of comfort must be asked for. When parent becomes child, and child, parent.
The World Doesn’t Wait
When everyone around me was dying, or so it felt like. When I was constantly bombarded with grief and pain. When everyone seemed to be fulfilled with sunshine while I was stuck in the rain. No. Not the rain. But a storm. Pushing me back and forth and mixing up my thoughts until I couldn't decipher what was right and wrong. Would I ever move on? Sometimes it seems like there's a force trying to egg me forward, but sometimes I miss its giant swoosh of arm and I fall back. Sometimes further back then when I began.
Oh No
"Time to measure!!" I squealed, jumping with joy. "How much have I grown?" I asked my mom. The smile on my rosy cheeks was stretching so wide I thought they would burst. A look of shock crossed my moms face as disbelief crawled into her eyes. "What?" I said, tilting my head, the broad grin gone. " Jessie," mom muttered, " you've grown 2 1/2 inches." " What???" I gasped. All happiness drained out of me. "How did this happen?!!" I thought. I suddenly didn't want to grow up.
