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Challenge Ended
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Ended August 18, 2020 • 39 Entries • Created by ColdRamen
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when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Cover image for post A Chat With Life, by Danceinsilence
Profile avatar image for Danceinsilence
Danceinsilence

A Chat With Life

Life: Here are some lemons for you.

Me: You can keep your lemons.

Life: But... but, don't you want to make lemonade?

Me: Not especially. Besides I don't like it when my lips pucker.

Life: So then, you don't want to kiss me?

Me: What! Kiss you? You have got to be joking!

Life: But you just said your lips pucker.

Me: Yeah, but not in a good way. They make my face wrinkly and weird looking.

Life: That's a shame. You do know lemons are healthy for you.

Me: See, that's the problem. Healthy things will kill me.

Life: I don't understand. Please explain.

Me: I've been eating all the wrong foods for years, drink four gallons of Pepsi a week.

Life: Wow! That much?

Me: Yes, and I never felt better. Why don't you just keep the lemons for yourself?

Life: I couldn't do that.

Me: Why not?

Life: They make life look ugly and wrinkly.

Me: (Just rolls my eyes.)

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for Shiv05
Shiv05

Lemons

When life gives you lemons, it is telling you to add a little zest to something that is bland.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for Mazzmyrrheyes
Mazzmyrrheyes

Rhythm & Rind

~

l

e

m

o

n

s

in abundance? Till the soil and

plant a shrub. Blueberry’s flavor

compliments, what, ’lone, is

sour grub. Then, seek the ones

who l o v e you, drink their

souls, sugar replete, and while

the lemonade c h i l l s, blow

raspberries, t i c k l e feet.

want creme de la c r e m e?

just a d d a cup of prosen

rhymes, s t i r your spirit,

strain for seeds & t o s s

the pith of bitter rinds.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for DustF1nger
DustF1nger

Fuck Lemons

When Life gives you lemons, throw it away. Limes are better. Change my mind.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for TrashyMaggie
TrashyMaggie

Life & lemons

When life gives you lemons, you make life easy peasy lemon squeezy; not sad, depressed, lemon zest.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for confusedsince10
confusedsince10

when life gives you lemons.......

you squirt the stupid people in the eye.

and watch them cry.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for zanlexus
zanlexus

Culinary Delight

When life gives you lemons:

Make sure to use the zest, it’s the best part.

Use them on seafood, meat and salad.

Add to vinagrettes and rich sauces (it’s really good in hollandaise).

Make a lemon merangue pie or lemon blueberry cake.

Sqeeze them over fruit with honey for a fantastic fruit salad.

Or sell them to chefs. They know exactly what to do with this culinary delight.

Seriously, you should see the giant boxes of lemons some kitchens have. Proably one of the most used fruits in restaurants. ^_^

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for marguerite14
marguerite14

When life gives you lemons...eat them. Messily. Spread them between your fingers until they burn the edges of your mouth. Drip them down your chin, devour them all. Then swallow your fears, look life in the eye, and grin through your gritty teeth.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for Rosemary212
Rosemary212

Rot

When life gives me lemons, I tend to shove them to the bottom of the fruit basket and forget about them. Three weeks later, I find them covered in mold and throw them out.

I'm pretty sure there is a lesson in there somewere.

Challenge
when life gives you lemons...
amuse me
Profile avatar image for Awoytuik
Awoytuik

Life doesn’t give you Lemons

When life gives you lemons? Life has given me a lot of things. Health issues, a major distrust of people, Murder Hornets, too much work for too little pay, but life has never given me lemons.