Cheers to you if you've got

The right kind of love

That never talk down to you

Treat you right love

The whispers in the night

Hold you tight kind of love

That always makes you smile

Thousand miles kind of love

Cheers to seeing in the

Right light kind of love

That looks in your eyes

Sees your soul deep love

That never judge

Always build you up high love

That nevermind the distance

We alright kind of love

That deep in your pocket

Super fly kind of love

And cheers to you if you're giving

that

kind

of

love.

My God do I love you.

From origin to termination.

Across every divide.

Through every dark valley.

Glistening in your rays.

Kissing the banks where I meet you.

With a burn in my chest

Chills through my body.

My breath intentional...

An attempt to contain the enormity

Of what I feel for you.

I know its more comfortable

To feel my love as a trickle.

But it is a river, after all.

At times, the dam defeated,

My love will run off course...

In desperate need only

of reaching you.

I do not apologize for

The force

With which

My mighty waters rage.

Only for my inability to

Fully contain or properly regulate it.

In its occasional breach,

It devours bits of earth.

Gathering strength in timber

And salt from stone.

Asking to be seen

Not as destructive.

But rather...

Expansive.

Unbridled.

Forging.

Welcome.

Revered.

For its endless nature.

It’s force.

It’s beauty.

It’s bounty.

This river loves

No less

Than for you to receive

And commune with it.

It is more to be comfort

To its ultimate purveyor

Than to just be the river itself.

It is the enriching reciprocity

That unleashes the

Raw power

That is

The river

And its greatest love.

Like your childhood blanket,

Only heavier,

And bigger...

Much bigger.

Yet, familiar.

It envelops you.

The darkness.

The relent.

The surrender.

The defeat.

It wraps you so tight,

And says...

Stay.

Stay with me here.

I'll take care of you.

But it can't...

It won't...

Take care of your children.

So you struggle.

You pry your way out of it.

Morning,

Upon endless morning,

Waiting.

Begging.

Yearning.

To just...lie down.

Crawl underneath it again.

And stay.

Just stay...

Forever.

When the clouds

Roll in

Yet again

Stripped of my sun

The sky a diffuse

Smothered light

Brings with it

The rain

Each drop

Its own intending

Memories

Hopes

Suffering

Comfort

Intermingled contrast

Bound by familiarity

Eyes fixed to the ceiling

Cheeks damp

Waiting to disappear

A symphony of drops

The only solace

Button by button

She said goodbye

One last snuggle in bed

As she started to cry

She didn't know then

This would be her last chance

To hold and feel him

The last stolen dance

As the truck turned the corner

She wanted to scream

Please come back, stay with me

You are all of my dreams

Instead she was brave

And she stood where he left her

She regrets that decision

Now sinking deep under

Swift and certain

You flipped that switch

Graced to so easily

Shut us off

It's not fair

You get to move on

And on

And on

And I'm trapped here

Floating in memories

And memories

And memories

Of you

And us

And endless dreams

Of our future

Left wanting

And forgotten

No more than

An empty milk carton

No continued use

Only impending stench

Reluctantly

Indoctrinated

Into the club of cynics.

Left to rot

Amongst dead dreams

And living nightmares.

The long goodbye.

A dash of love.

An abysmal absence.

A painful new vacancy.

Loss was nothing new.

But this one was suffocating.

She wished she could take it all back.

Never know this love existed.

She wished she had been worth it.

But she wasn't.

All she brought now was hate and animosity.

She wished he still loved her.

Longed for her.

Would do anything for her.

But he didn't.

Couldn't.

Wouldn't.

She will never understand why.

She believed and saw and felt.

It was beautiful.

And bigger than the both of them.

But all it takes is one to decide.

One to stop responding

One to retract love

One to build a wall

One to push off

One to leave

One to shut it down forever

And she hated that there was literally nothing she could do about it.

Not breathe it away

Not wish it away

Not forget it

Not lessen it

Not have it

Not live

She was useless and worthless.

And stupid....

So stupid 

For ever having hope he'd stay. 

She looks out the window again

For him

Laughs at her herself

Silly girl

He's not coming

Why would he

So you can be his morning regret

You're already his afternoon, evening and night ones

Like he needs another

She loved with her whole heart.

People called her childish and silly.

But she did it anyway.

She always saw the best in people.

That made others shake their head and laugh.

She didn't care.

She had hurts so thick and deep

Anyone would drown in them.

So she kept them to herself.

She was wild at heart.

But foolishly gave her heart to savages.

They relentlessly tamed her.

She was brave enough to be a mother.

Turns out that's not the skill for success.

Giving them life would have to be enough.

She was lucky enough to know the truest love.

Simply touching it turned it all to ash.

So she put them in an urn and hung her hat.

People sought her wisdom at times.

She never actually had any of her own.

Repackaging other's words became her craft.

She was a fraud.

But she loved.

And she would have wanted that to be her legacy.

Love in spite of her tainted truth.

Love slathered heavily over her scars.

Love given and given and given...

But never really received.

Just lent.

And retrieved.

Time and again.

And it broke her.

Especially the biggest one.

This time for good.