When I was younger I was diagnosed with a mood disorder at the time it was just DMDD or dysfunctional mood dysregulation disorder but now that I'm older it's odd (officinal defiant disorder) and DMDD. It makes me feel powerless having to take meds and go to therapy just to control the fact that I can't control my disorders, my mood... One year I lashed out and said something some kid said I was so pale I looked dead so I had said he looked so black but I never finished it then I started getting called a racist for the whole year and that pushed me to do something I regret to this day I started Self-Harm. I had no one until I started making online friends online I felt in control of myself and who I was and I found myself along the way. on bad days my online friends helped me comfort me and helped me slip into my little space to help myself but on good days we laughed messed with each other and joked around. Over time after being sent to mental hospitals and residential I got better I got my confidence back I got my happiness back so even though I still struggle with self-harm I'm getting better and that's all that matter. I love my friends my family and most importantly myself and I won't let anything get between me from being happy ever again.

When I was younger me and my sister where just like normal kids didn't like but didn't hate vegetables but when i was around 6 maybe 7 my step dad said okay lets try something and put vegetables in are stockings, and last year I saw my sister had corn and I had green beans and we both said we wanted each others so we traded.

We all know that there is a barrier between life and death but is there a place where life and death meet can a person go into the afterlife can the afterlife come to the real world. What if we could see the dead do the dead really watch us. There are so many questions that cannot be answered will they ever be. We will never know but what I do know is that death doesn’t want to hurt or kill us she just wants to make a place where we can be happy and enjoy ourselves. So next time someone you know dies just know death didn’t do it to hurt you and that’s why it rains when someone dies she is saying sorry for taking your loved one or friend.

Hello i'm Alex and i stuggle in alot of thing school home i feel like every one is just presering me to do better my parents say im so smart and I need to try harder but school just isnt my strong point i like art minecraft playing with my friend and making new friends any normal stuff a kid wants to do but my parents think im so fucking smart they dont see me struggle are all the problem this causes. I already suffer with something called dmdd and i take pills but i hate doing it and if to add onto the presser i get picked on and forget to take my pills which means my parents yell about that to but thats normally all the stuff i stuggle with thank you for lisening to my or reading about me but thank you and good bye

Dear Nova Light

Hello my Love sorry for not writing sooner but I ran out of paper and had to wait three weeks for more. I have missed you so sensed you have moved away but at least we can still write.

From yours truly

Noah Black

Oh dear me I hope she isn’t mad.

Dear Noah Black

Hello, Sweety, I’m so glad that you can write back again. But I have something to tell you, I'M COMING BACK HOME THIS WEEK! I can wait to see you but see you when I get there

Love

Nova Light

As I read this letter I couldn't help but jump around in joy when I heard she was coming back home. I can't wait to see her. As I was jumping in joy I heard a knock on the door “ Who might that be ''. I thought as I started walking over to the door. Then I heard it open and close I panicked who could it be a robber? A killer? it can’t be my family. They never come here. But then I saw Nova come around the corner but she looked different her eyes were... buttons “ Noah I have missed you dearly how are you”. “ good” I said “Great now let’s go color” she said cheerfully as she started to drag me to my art room. I started to giggle at her silliness then I felt my face hit the cold floor “OOOOOOWWWWWW”! I yelled. I looked up at Nova. She looked like she was about to cry, then she started apologizing and giving me hugs and kisse, after a while I started to laugh and smile. I got up and looked at Nova, she looked like she had seen me die.

“ Nova”? I whispered then she ran to the spare room I had. I started to walk to the spare room and heard a strange noise. It sounded like skin being sewed together, as I walked into the spare room there Nova was sewing fabric into her skin. “NOVA”! I yelled as I ran over to her and grabbed the needle she was using to sew the fabric into her skin. She looked at me in shoke and I looked back at her with the same shocked expression. This kept happening. She would stay in a room, I would find her sewing fabric into her skin, it was a constant loop.

After two weeks of this loop I heard the doorbell, I opened the door and saw two cops “ Are you Noah Black”? The first officer asked “ Yes, Do you need something”? I asked, really confused, what did I do? “ Sir, your girlfriend was found dead” The second officer said. Dead no she couldn't be she was here with me “ Show me proof”! I raised my voice slightly irritated, then the first cop pulled a photo of Nova. She had buttons sewed into her eyes and tears rolled down her cheeks with blood, as I looked at her legs and arms she had fabric sewed into her skin but yet it was Nova. After talking to the cops for a while I turned to ghost Nova. She looked sad then I hugged her “ It's time to go where you belong” then I felt a sharp pain in my back. I fell to the floor as I looked up with tears in my eyes. I saw ghost Nova with a sledgehammer above her head and she said “ Goodbye Noah see you in the afterlife then everything turned black.

And that's the story on how I Noah black died.