People say that eyes are windows to the soul. I just don’t believe that.

Eyes can be deceiving. They can have you believe that someone is a good soul.

But I had looked into your eyes many times before and thought I was safe with someone kind, caring, thoughtful, considerate, and good natured. The truth was you were someone dark, selfish, and uncaring.

You had me fooled thinking you loved me, that you were soft like a sheep but you were secretly planning to eat me alive like the wolf you actually were.

Sweet as summer sunshine

and bright as a field of sunflowers.

She's always there for me

for when I need her a hand full of sunshine,

and for when I don't think I need her.

These times are always very dark.

She's a lighthouse, shining bright,

guiding me back to shore.

Stopping me from drowing in my sea of darkness.

Other times she's like a happy bird,

chirping joyfully at something she loves.

It always tranfers to me, making me smile brightly.

She is the epitome of smiles and sunshine.

I should of talked to you more.

I know friendship is a two way street but it's so hard,

please understand.

I don't wish to play with your feelings,

I really do care about you.

I want to call you my friend.

I want to do what friends do,

to be there for you when you need someone to listen.

or even a shoulder to cry on.

If thats what you need. I would be that.

My head feels like there are several people occupying it,

so it might take a moment for me to get back to you but I swear I will.

I always do.

I know I said "I" a lot in this letter for you

but like I said

friendship is a two way street.

You have to try as well.

-S

Your love gives me a simple kind of warmth

but at the same time,

not so simple.

It's like the morning light.

Peaking through the tops of trees

Trickling through the leaves

and into my heart,

gentle and soft.

Safe.

I love you like a harsh tornado.

Coming in fierce and strong

and full of passion.

But this tornado doesn’t stop

it keeps going... and going.

Wanting to spread and show our love

to those need to see that its possible and to those who accept us for who we are.

We are strong.

We are brave.

We will power through.

Peace and calmness waits for us.

Pick pick pick

A blemish on my face.

Pick pick pick

Can't stop picking.

No more blemish but I must

Pick pick pick

A little bump on my shoulder

Pick pick pick

It's nothing but I must

Pick pick pick

So anxious

Pick pick pick

Starting to panic

Pick pick pick

It's nothing but I have to

Pick pick pick

There's nothing there but I have to

Pick pick pick

Starting to calm down

I can finally stop

Pick pick picking

I wish I had a car.

So that I can escape when everything becomes too much.

I wish I had a job to help pay for the cars expenses,

And to buy the things I want 

So I do not look like a beggar to the ones I love most.

I wish I didn’t have this anxiety 

Eating away at me till there’s nothing left except nausea

I wish I was more social and had more friends 

So that I can rely on someone that’s not me 

I wish I could tell someone my deepest darkest secrets and have them not judge me for them

I wish I still had my childhood

I wish that it was not taken from me forcefully by some teenage boy who I thought he knew what he was doing. 

Being the small six year old that’s I was,  I followed his lead. 

But in the end,

I just wish I was happy.