“Nobody Knows”

“I’m Fine” written backwards is “Save Me”

Nobody knows that “I’m Fine” is a silent cry for help

Nobody knows the real reason I take such long showers is because I cry in the shower so no one can hear me

No, you have it all wrong ....

I don’t cut myself because I’m trying to kill myself

I cut myself because I’m fighting to stay alive

Nobody knows I lie awake at night drowning in my own tears

Nobody knows I cry myself to sleep

They know my name, not my story

They see my smile, not my pain

They notice my cuts, not my scars

They’ve heard what I’ve done, not what I’ve been through

I’m the girl with the mind that never sleeps

Nobody knows I’m hanging on for dear life to a non-existent relationship with my mother because I long for a mother daughter relationship

In one breath, I hate her

I hate her with a passion & wish she’d die & put me out of my misery

But in another ....

I feel obligated to love her unconditionally because she’s my mother & I only get one

Nobody knows that I’m cut into so many pieces that there isn’t enough of me to be put back together

Nobody knows what happens behind closed doors

Nobody knows that I hide behind a fake smile

Nobody knows because nobody cares enough to ask in fear they’ll get more than what they bargained for