Tell me how to feel, Can you tell me how to think?

You go and run your mouth

Not caring what I say

Tell me how to feel,

Can you tell me how to think?

Oh my apologies

I forgot that I wasn’t my “own”

Just another “carbon copy”

With the same way of thinking,

And feeling as you

I mean how else would explain?

The gnawing disgust and fear

In every mirror when I wake up.

When I look and want to shed

This awful skin that won’t come off

When the sounds of my voice

Forces me into a state of silence

That constant film on repeat

Where everyone knows the lines

To the character you are “meant” to play

But you are just froze

In silence

Stage fright eating away at you

And all you can do is go along

And smile…

Smile through the pain

Oh wait…

“I don’t feel this way” to you

I guess it’s not real then

But wait it is!

Because I am who I am

And you aren’t me

My thoughts aren’t yours

Nor anyone else’s

I’m not doing this for attention

Or to “fit” in

I’m doing this for me

To be myself

Completely

Without letting others’ get in the way

Because for so long

I tried to be what everyone wanted

I didn’t think of me

All I thought was if others’ were happy

I did everything

And what did it get me?

Nothing!

I tried to make people happy

Nobody stays satisfied

And you can try, try, try

And keep thinking

If you make them content

Then you will be happy

But that doesn’t happen!

You can’t expect to build yourself up

If you never put yourself first

’Cause people are going to break you

Take your stones

And try to ruin the very foundation

That keeps you alive

And like a sun

That pushed away the clouds

I realized this

If I want to be happy

Then I got to be myself

Nothing compares

To the way I feel

When I look in that mirror

And see actually see

My smile spreads on my face

And I am ready for the day

The comfort from the layers

That hides what shouldn’t be

I won’t throw myself away for others

Instead I’m on a path

A path to just being me

A path to happiness

Because what really is life worth

To push yourself around

If you aren’t happy in the end?