Night scares me

After 9pm

I get scared

Not because of monsters

Not because of the dark

But of myself

For night is when I start thinking

Night is when my head starts shuffling

Through everything

Everything unhappy

I get scared

Of what I might do

Each night is a struggle. I am literally haunted by myself

By 11pm I practically go insane

uncontrollable sobs clog my nostrils with snot as I try to calm my rapid breathing

I wish that was the worst part. But my night has only just begun.

I really hate night.