The knife was on the floor. The shaking in my hands. The tears were arriving. And the only thing in my mind was a question, a very important one that i ask myself a lot ever since this sick game started of hating. How did i end up here?.

Life. A labyrinth made to confuse us, an endless void of questions without answers, that we all keep on wandering, because if we didn't, What else could we do?, so we live life and we try our best, and we try to be happy, but the thing is, What is happy?, How do we achieve this concept that has forever been the purpose of life?, What is happiness?.

I thought I knew, I thought happiness was running through my house, chasing my baby brother, it was climbing my dad's back, and piggyback ride, it was my mom brushing my hair, and my sister singing songs, it was going to school, and seeing my friends, it was autumn leaves falling, birds singing in the morning, it was breakfast, lunch and dinner, it was movie night with my family, it was being...alive.

But now, I don't like to run anymore, if I piggyback ride with my dad, I'll probably break his column, my mum has too much work, so I brush my own hair, my sister keeps singing, but it doesn't feel like it used to, school is way too hard, and I'm way too tired, I lost touch with most of my friends to the point where I don't think I can call them that anymore, autumn is depressing, birds wake me up when all I want to do is sleep, models in magazines tell me im too much, so i haven't eaten in days, there are no more family nights, because mom and dad got divorced, and being alive is just...exhausting.

And it is all my fault, from beggining to end, I lost touch with reality, I made existing hell, I created this awful world in which I lie to my parents, and keep secrets, and don't talk to my friends, I did this to me, I put myself here, and I don't even know why.

My greatest enemy is my reflexion, I have ruined my life, so that night I decided I had to pay, it was either killing me, or having to spend the rest of my life with myself, and out of the two, I picked the latter, so I went to the kitchen, and was ready to commit murder, when a smile from the living room distracted me from my plans.

It was a photo of myself, I must be 7 or so, I am on the beach with my family, I have sand in my face and a wide smile, that little child doesn't deserve this, I drop the weapon, frightened by what I was planning to do, I cry for half an hour, god What happened to me?, How did I end up here?, about to murder an innocent, who hasn't done anything but her best, about to kill all of me, when I really only want to get rid of one part, it's ridiculous, How did that lovely child, who was so full of life, became this monster, so willing to take it away?.

And so, I make a pact with myself, we will protect that child, we will walk on her shoes, and see the world as colorful and as bright as she would, we will do everything to be happy, no matter how much effort it takes, because that kid would want it that way, because that kid deserves it, because that kid has a ton of stuff coming her way, and she could use an ally, so I will try to live like she would want me to, because the truth is...there is no harm in trying.

The knife was on the floor. The shaking in my hands. The tears were arriving. And the only thing in my mind was a question, a very important one that i ask myself a lot ever since this sick game started of hating. How did i end up here?.

Life. A labyrinth made to confuse us, an endless void of questions without answers, that we all keep on wandering, because if we didn't, What else could we do?, so we live life and we try our best, and we try to be happy, but the thing is, What is happy?, How do we achieve this concept that has forever been the purpose of life?, What is happiness?.

I thought I knew, I thought happiness was running through my house, chasing my baby brother, it was climbing my dad's back, and piggyback ride, it was my mom brushing my hair, and my sister singing songs, it was going to school, and seeing my friends, it was autumn leaves falling, birds singing in the morning, it was breakfast, lunch and dinner, it was movie night with my family, it was being...alive.

But now, I don't like to run anymore, if I piggyback ride with my dad, I'll probably break his column, my mum has too much work, so I brush my own hair, my sister keeps singing, but it doesn't feel like it used to, school is way too hard, and I'm way too tired, I lost touch with most of my friends to the point where I don't think I can call them that anymore, autumn is depressing, birds wake me up when all I want to do is sleep, models in magazines tell me im too much, so i haven't eaten in days, there are no more family nights, because mom and dad got divorced, and being alive is just...exhausting.

And it is all my fault, from beggining to end, I lost touch with reality, I made existing hell, I created this awful world in which I lie to my parents, and keep secrets, and don't talk to my friends, I did this to me, I put myself here, and I don't even know why.

My greatest enemy is my reflexion, I have ruined my life, so that night I decided I had to pay, it was either killing me, or having to spend the rest of my life with myself, and out of the two, I picked the latter, so I went to the kitchen, and was ready to commit murder, when a smile from the living room distracted me from my plans.

It was a photo of myself, I must be 7 or so, I am on the beach with my family, I have sand in my face and a wide smile, that little child doesn't deserve this, I drop the weapon, frightened by what I was planning to do, I cry for half an hour, god What happened to me?, How did I end up here?, about to murder an innocent, who hasn't done anything but her best, about to kill all of me, when I really only want to get rid of one part, it's ridiculous, How did that lovely child, who was so full of life, became this monster, so willing to take it away?.

And so, I make a pact with myself, we will protect that child, we will walk on her shoes, and see the world as colorful and as bright as she would, we will do everything to be happy, no matter how much effort it takes, because that kid would want it that way, because that kid deserves it, because that kid has a ton of stuff coming her way, and she could use an ally, so I will try to live like she would want me to, because the truth is...there is no harm in trying.