Bright and warm rays of sunshine woke me

I dressed and opened the door

To find myself in a luscious paradise

The sparkling river and fragrant vegetation

Encapsulating my senses

I was surrounded by friends

Whose joyful laughter filled the air

And left behind a sweet contagious mirth

We ventured out in this fantastical world

And walked along the narrow paths of the river village

We peeked into the family-owned shops

And smelled the spicy aromas that wafted through the air

We joined a riverboat cruise and floated to hidden places

Seeing ancient ruins, golden statues, and playful koi

We explored these wonderous sites until night fell

And as we walked beside the river our attention was drawn

To one of the most stunning and captivating sunsets I’d ever seen

It was as if seeing the world through rose-colored glasses

As we continued on, we followed mouthwatering smells

Until we reached a lovely restaurant that glowed in the evening light

We ate, drank, and were merry as we listened to the music of the night

And this day reached its end as we zoomed home on the back of mopeds

I will never forget the magic of this day and the outpouring of bliss

That turned out to be all too fleeting

I gripped tightly

Gripped tightly for the chance

The chance to escape this state

This state that left a feeling of

Isolation

Confusion

Frusturation

And a voice unheard in me

I grip tightly

Grip tightly for this chance

This chance to be reborn

Reborn in my dream world where I

Smile

Laugh

Play

And let my voice be free

My grip loosens

Grip loosens at the realization

The realization that I did not escape

Escape from the cruel voices that rage

You are not enough.

You are inferior.

You are unwanted.

And my voice is erased

I was never safe from this malevolence

The malevolence of my inner world