Is it possible to leave in spring? But she was leaving. We were sitting on the terrace of our house. She came to say goodbye. She was leaving the town. She was leaving me too, but was not aware of it. I could never tell that i loved her. I had made thousands of sentences to her. Maybe there were tens of thousands of letters in them. But those letters didn’t come side by side and even make the sentence “I love you.”. We talked about this and that for a while, talked about old friends.. Moments were migrating to memoirs mercilessly. This moment would turn into a memoir as well.

Both of us were silent, for a while. Words came to tip of my tongue and i was about to say that i loved her but i failed again. I got up. She didn’t even move and kept watching the scene. I put a record on the pickup. And i just wanted to record this moment into the music. It would tell her what i couldn’t say. It would speak as it was me. Leonard Cohen was playing. “Dance Me To The End Of Love”. I went to her and said, “Lets dance.”. She looked into my eyes: “I will leave soon. Lets watch the stars.”. She was so pretty. In her eyes, there where stars whose lights haven’t reached the world yet. I couldn’t tell to her. Then she left. I was all alone with Leonard Cohen. I looked down from the terrace. Every time that I have looked, i felt a strange feeling. Life really sucked. I thought about jumping again. Then, I gave up again. The music was just great.