I once sang on great stages for roses

Picking strings in quite eloquent poses

Then I birthed from vaginer

A small army of minor

And my time is now spent picking noses

riding can be quite the thrill

provided you're tearing madly uphill

if you choose to face backward

you've achieved a great catchword

and it works swell with Bill and with Phil.

I once had a very short penis

The women would laugh at it's weeness

So I strapped on a rock

To help lengthen my cock

And now they're bemused by it's leanness

Damn......

There was once a young lass named Cora

Who loved sex and always wanted more-a

Man asked for more than he should

She said she would if she could

He did and he damned near tore-a.

There was a small human called John

Who knew not which side he was on.

He suffered and fought,

Then he staggered and wrought

Til the world as he knew it was gone.

Corona California can be really really boring 

But it's the place that I'm adoring

I hate the weather here 

I'd rather be on a pier 

Yet I remain at home snoring.

if one asks you what secrets you keep

you'll respond with, I trust, not a peep

for while I lay here napping

my pillow, my dreams trapping

in my favorite location: asleep

There once was a man from Nantucket

Who asked all his girls to suck it

But they're lips would've sung

Had he just used his tongue

He now just jerks off in a bucket