I am not ready.

I will die.

I will fall from the sky

You will cry

With tears of guilt

Knowing that I've said this

Before I was killed.

Mommy,I don't want to go back there. I know you said I have to, but I just don't want to. Why can't I be like the others? Why can't I run and play with them? Why can't I go to school like they do? I'd rather stay at home forever and ever than go back there, mommy. That man is mean. He makes me do the same things over and over again. He screams at me no matter how hard I try to do my best. Maybe my best isn't enough. I don't know why I mess everything up. I scrub and scrub those plates without a break, mommy. I felt awful when that cup hit the floor and shattered to pieces. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I told him I was sorry, I did, but he was so mad, so loud. My cheeks still hurt from his slap. And I promised him I would never do anything wrong ever again. Until I spilled boiling hot sauce all over the floor. It..it wasn't entirely my fault. I tripped over a sac of potatoes and..and I couldn't stop the bowl from slipping out of my grasp. He was so angry and scary. He made me cry all day long. He said he would give me one last chance. But I don't want another chance,mommy. I don't ! I'm not good enough to stay there any longer. Please let me stay at home. I know you said we need the money, but I'd rather be like the others ,than have money.

You skair me. You punishd me for swimming, but I wasnt. I didn't. You didnt belleeve me. I told you I thot it was brokin but you made me stand on it anyway. It felt like a gazillion tiny shards of glass grinding in my ankel, thats why I skreemed.

I gust wantd you to now. And renting the newest land befor time wont reelly make me feel bedder. But I accept. For you.

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(Author note, yes the miss-spellings were completely intentional. I couldn't spell to save my life when I was seven.)

|| another-proser ||