There was no reason to continue, my entire life was a wreck. I'd lost my child, my heart, and my mind. I had absolutely nothing left. I considered on the long drive into town to take my car and smash into the vehicle that was going southbound. I thought about taking all of the medicine I was given to help me function, strip my self down and go for a swim. I thought about slicing my wrists to the bone, and then I considered leaving my mother all alone.