Write.

Typically on paper with a pen or a pencil, mark down the days passing of my youth. Letters words symbols that last a life time tell of my life time in moments.

Come with me to far away lands where we can be alone together but always near. Where fogy dreams and vivid memories become unwound a mess but clear.

Flea with me on a trip that only one’s mind eye can see, bathed in the wilderness and don't worry about the don’ts won’ts could haves and never has beens.

“Your heart is free have the courage to follow it“

Awaken to today‘s yesterdays tomorrow. Let me fill your head with images of what can but will never be where men touch angels and fire meet ice such, is such contradictory.

Tonight I enter the town of my rebirth.

I want to be ready.

The smoke, the drink of wine, tonight alone repeat..

Relax the mind with a drink of wine to sweeten the scent of mary’s hemp the night is not so lonely.

Tonight the night windy her might she comes to stay but not for the night it makes me feel so lowly.

At last alas, my wine all gone my belly warm and my mind a cloud I float on in to the morning.

I wake awake the dreams from my eyes I shake to work for work it makes time go by so slowly.

I’m out by night I live for the sight of living a life not so controlling.

Alone.

Always alone. Peculiar in nature my heart yearns to always be alone.

Particularly from other humans, for most are a distraction from allowing me to ponder life.

Yes my heart wishes to travel to empty spaces and planes of nothingness, where people no longer venture, and not even eagles dare to sore.

Alone floating among beautiful waters. You will find me bathing in sun light naked unafraid of wondering eyes nothing to fear but days end.

Alone. My heart yearns to be alone.

Leave me at the mercy of your pity for I am only in good company when no one is near.

Allow me leave from this social machine on the conveyor belt of totalitarian society they call life.

Brain washed into wanting nothing more but to own a piece of land while they sell you manufactured water and bottled air.

Oh, ALOOOONE!

My heart yearns to be alone.

Her lips do so much more than whisper sweet nothings and promises like flavor filled exotic fruits. They are ripe for the suckling.

Her scent fills my air and sugar begins coursing through my lungs and I can almost taste her as she walks on by.

look at me.

I think to myself.

As her radiance escapes me, Our eyes never meet.

Time slows to a whisper as she passes my company not at all noticing me.

The moment over in an instant, but felt like a life time.. Such as beautiful moments so often do.

Her lips do so much more…

Slowly, the demon cast her burning spell upon him.

I know not and understand not the working of my own mind.

The despair she seeks in me has been granted while she is away.

So full of defiance, my love is not one for this world and she constantly leaves my side..

I SCREAM her name like a man on his death bed hysterical with disillusion.

But this does not stop her from taking her leave..

I weep and I break, after wound upon wound is inflicted by her lack of concern.

“The night is so different” I think out loud.

The night is so different without her and it’s stars so un-astounding in their magnificence.

The silence rings out in foreboding hymns telling of a future so horridly silent all you hear is the faint beating of my heart in the foreground.

She will never return. These days will not pass gently. My loving heart does not falter unwavering in its desires to see you. To hold you once again.

But time has revealed love as young as ours, silly, but so much given of the soul.

The deepest love never more so know than when we are young with a fresh heart. Your first love more powerful naïve and childish then any other love there after.

But oh so much sweeter.

”The night is different without her.”

”Yet here I stay unchanged.”

”No more does the wind whisper her scent nor does it chant her name.”

Fin.

It’s May 5th 2024. 7:40 a.m. I am 30 years old now. Sitting In my car alone I hear the hoot of an owl joined in by small beautiful song birds as the sun begins to rise.

I sit.

I Listen.

I begin to wonder.

What is the meaning of this life?

Of this totalitarian society we have condemned ourselves to.

What is freedom?

If not being able to sing a song when and were we please? To travel and sore without borders such as the birds do.

Are we truly free. Free to live? Free to love? Free to do as we please?

Society says NO. You must work. You must serve others. You must be a good citizen.

The owl begins to hoot again as my madness reaches its peak.

I am awake.

Are you?

Worried i might offend you by focusing on my passions more then on you.

I stopped.

Stopped on my path of written context and the artistic expression of my life.

To cease expression of my own emotions in order to lift yours.

Is this not Love?

In the end you left anyway.

So now I put my heart on paper and vow to never let another be able to stop me from expressing it freely.

Reborn, I move forward to expressing life the only way I know how.

Bad with spoken word.

But when my pen hits that pad divinity flows to my heart, through the ink, forever planted on paper it will grow and spread like weeds.

and in the sun,

flowers will bloom and I will blossom along side them.

from seed to sunflower.

There is a place,

A place of peace and transcendence.

Where the free run naked and wild, where time is forgotten and love is endless..

Where the overflowing streams of joy drown out the worries of modern man.

There..

Yes, there!

I will meet you in the shallows and we can wade in its depths and sink into one another.

This place lost when I wake, only to be replaced by the reality that Is your beauty.

As I turn to see your face snuggled in comfort and nose buried in supple freshly washed sheets.

I patiently wait for the sandman’s twinkling dust to be shaken from your waking eyes.

I lye there thinking to myself “To whom it may concern“ “I have found paradise in you”

Fingers rolling down her cheeks flowing smoother than a mid summer stream rushing through her mounds of flesh her body is like walking through an uncharted forest excitingly beautiful but dangerous for one wrong move can be disastrous feeling my way through her jungle I reach a clearing the sky’s open up and I take in her cool breeze destination reached i dive into her refreshing waters as her legs wrap around my face paradise has found me la petite mort.

Her name tears at the linings of my heart,

She crawls into my mind and plants herself like a unknown seedling

Muttering my own death chant I say her name

rebirth has chosen only a few and with mine I will bloom

because she has planted within me a soul

a conviction no trial can appeal

her love has claimed me and I will not ignore faith

for even a love that’s fleeting is better than a love never had but when one finds his meaning that love will never be bad.