Him.

Her.

Their soft noses are the answer.

You.

And, I.

It's the reason to survive.

The ocean.

It's the best moment to feel.

Because it's you and I.

That's the reason we survive.

Take me on this gambit.

What's out choice of habit.

It is fear?

Or is it happiness?

I don't care, long carress.

So, you.

Or I?

It's the best way we survive.

While, the past behind.

Can leave us with some strife.

I'll leave you near to me at all times.

There is no way we say goodbye...

Without good times.

So there is no way for goodbye.

Because together,

You.

And.

I.

What if I don't?

What if I won't?

What if I just stay this way?

Leave things to never change?

What if I don't heal?

Then I might reel?

You can't say it it'll change.

You pretend it's all the rage.

But, what if I don't?

I used to hear the phrase, "They need a new word for that." But I will tell you the amount of loathing that I have for this man, I will never forget.

Let's start with how he was sweet to me for about the first two years. Then, when he went off the Lithium (I did not know he took.) He started beating me.

After the first two, I called my father. He heard it in the background, but didnt get off the couch because he said I probably deserved it. I had actually called my mother's phone but she was in bed.

But, after that I locked all the doors in the second room. I was between jobs and no car, and it was well after 2 a.m.

Cops came around 3 a.m. and they said I was under arrest for assault. At that point, I had been curled under the covers and bruises all over my body.

He has called them and said I threatened him.

He ended up getting off free, even though the bruises matched perfectly to fingers on my forearms, a swollen eye and a bruise on my neck.

He had none. But was at no fault.

Chained behind my back, I heard the officer say, "She was the one who should have called."

END

You held my hand,

I let you hold mine.

Time would tell if it only felt right.

With an absent father,

And a future that wasn't bright.

Your tired paws...

Well, it just felt alright.

I've cried on your shoulders

You've cried on mine.

With the world so undecided

I guess we made it right.

Two lost soldiers,

Trying to make up time.

Well, you held my hands

Made it alright.

I'll think of memories that I cannot not use

In this eulogy,

It'll get people confused.

But you held my hand,

And I asked you to hold mine.

While we battled this world,

That wasn't right.

Nothing I say,

I guess will bring you back.

I will conquer this pain

And deal with all the past.

But I loved you friend,

And I can't say it again.

I loved you more then the words that exist.

I could lift this wall,

Even though I am quite small.

I would touch the top,

Without evening having to jump up.

I would build a bridge,

Without out the right tools then.

I would stay and fight,

Without even a knife.

I would walk through fire,

With a suit doused and kerosene and a lighter.

I would have ended the call,

If I knew the end game at all.

I promised you all of things,

Yet, the morning the phone rings.

Sorry subconscious,

Guess, knowing is just not enough.

You said with mystery,

That form of death was history.

Oh, how I believed.

The years went on,

I thought you carried on

Quite well for yourself,

Or at least, I couldn't tell.

Then you broke the leaf,

The water, drowning things.

I couldn't figure out.

Those leaves have no doubt.

I begged you, begged you please.

Stop all these horrible things.

You are one of kind.

Keep that in mind.

I couldn't save you.

The body was blue.

The fent was plain and clear.

It's not a day, I don't shed a tear.

Please forgive me.

I wish I knew more.

But I was stupid,

I wish...I knew more.

Please forgive me.

I hope you heart is free.

You were beautiful

And for 3 years I will

Remember everything

The way your earrings rang

In the wistful wind

Th way your hair would spin

The way you eyes

Looked in them so many times

Never saw a demise

Until that fateful night.

But no words of true sadness.

You deserve believe, and I hope you found it.

I love you.

And if everything is true.

I'll see you soon.

xoxo

from a friend

Indulgence. I indulged. His pretty face and smile. The way he touches your arm so slight. I'd be at a weight watchers for the calories I gained craving him. So I starve myself instead. I do not answer his calls. I do not try to see him. I hope, maybe, to just wean myself off of the idea of wanting. But sometimes I backslide. I do not mean to. It is just easy, and you would not believe how amazing it tastes, feels, well, everything. Gluttony may be a sin, but it is definitely a world I kind of want to live in.

I have scars. Some that I speak about. Some that I will never speak about. And obviously some you and I can see.

But these roadmaps , start from the beginning. From clawing myself out of a certain type of abuse to learning what it is to be truly loved.

Sometimes the map is hard to read. So, I continually follow, hoping it will get me to where I am searching for. I may be naive, but I know exactly what I am looking for.

They start at the beginning of 14. When something happened and it kept happening until I finally shut it down. My arms took the burden.

Then again at 21. My body and face took that burden on.

Again at 31. My face and head was the brunt of that force.

But at 34. My life became different. I almost ruined it. I wanted to die. But you.

You were the one that pulled me out. You never touched me, kissed me. You never forced. You were the one that said no. You were the one that said no matted what that I will always love you, and when you are ready. Maybe.

So I agree.

One day. Maybe.

XOXO,

Friend

Why do you go to therapy?

To feel like you're resolving you problems on love? You issues with your family? Work stress?

Here is as far as I know about dogs because to be honest I don't know much. But dogs are the best things in the entire world. Because they don't give a crap about if you are happy or sad as long as they can kiss you, get belly rubs, treats, etc. they are literally the best things you can ever have because even if you get upset that they ate your shoes, they will forgive you for being upset almost instantly. I have two and I will say, I will never have regrets about a single day I've had them in my life. A man's bestfriend? Nope, they are a woman's bestfriend, but secretly I think it's because I'm the one that gives them treats.

Dog lover forever!