Nothing will remain

and that is what is truly terrifying.

We will die, and not even ghosts of our life will linger.

Homes will be swallowed whole

as children are crushed beneath the weight of molten earth

mothers drown to save their young

while fathers fight fires that have already won

tongues of Titans that seem to twirl at your despair

the same tongues I have begged to make love to me in my sleep

I have always wondered what it would feel like

to drown and burn alive at the same time

yet never in my life I would imagine such

four a.m tragedies would escape the backsides of my eyes

singing

feed me, feed me,

and another home sinks to smoke

feed me, feed me,

and another family is encased in stone

feed me, feed me

another death, no memory to atone

feed me, feed me,

in the end, we all died alone.

I see everything, hear everything,

breathe and bask in, everything.

I lie here in wait for the day

you walk through the door and notice

beneath lodestar, lintel and locust wings

above chimney, churn, church bell

Basking in the love of every Yuletide turn of wheel

pluck me from my perch and with purest of promises

raise me to Heaven and tell the angels,

Happy holidays, and have an enchanted New Year.

I fear change like caterpillars as their bodies encase themselves in cocoons;

Nerves burning

body changing without consent of brain

world darkening

as I close and close and close and then,

I am nothing.

Will I live for a day upon bursting out with such radiant wings

or will I be crushed under adolescent heel,

my remains puddles of puss and pieces of shell?

Time will tell its tall tales

and then silence itself till we forget it ever existed

yet I will remember this fear,

this horror of feeling yourself from within

like snakes shedding their skin

ripping yourself to pieces to see the sun tomorrow

but tomorrow, the sun has died

and the moon just sits there and asks

“Who are you?”

I do not know, I do not know, I do not know

I do not know when the summer will come, but it will.

The snow will melt and we will forget

my children will rise from the soil

roses among buds

and they will bend their backs and stretch

rejoicing in break of sun

warmth against flesh not a cloud in the sky

a day that never has to end

a night that will never come to pass.

But it will again.

It always comes back.

The city burns

and I hear her scream,

hear all the people fall and fade and burn,

lose form and flicker beneath the earth.

I hear them, and I hear God,

holy trumpeteers and flutter of angels wings.

Only a glance, I tell myself, pushing her ahead.

To gaze as a father destroys his children

sweetest perdition to ever be wrought in the name of glory,

and in that second my eyes popped, a flash, and then I fell apart,

for as he burned the city, I swear,

He was crying.

Everything on this earth

has birthed itself into existence

with a thought

but I, splinter child

seven years between brother

must have thought too hard about

whether or not there is life on Mars

or if God watches you go to the bathroom

or if when I grow up I will find somebody to love me

as much as I do /

as much as I love you/

as much as I try to/

as much as I wish I did.

Where will we go when we die?

Will we wait till we birth ourselves again

as we dream about the sunrise?

And what about the things we leave behind?

What is left after The End?

Credits roll,

I pray they don’t crush you

Lord allow me an Epilogue

to show that I love you.