I'm clueless. "Where to begin?"

I've fallen apart again.

Attached at the hip, conjoined, laced.

Belittled, misery's embrace.

Welcoming of a new face.

Rebound, ghosted, hosted, "I'm sad."

None shall grievance the way I had.

Sense of belonging I needed of you.

A helping hand, a reason to un-rue.

Waiting endless, a conscience coincidence.

Passion derailed upon righteous incidence.

"Yes," my world, "Goodbye," the one we live.

Atrocity, anarchy, troubled chagrin.

I gave you every piece of me unrecognized,

changed with your demanding need, to be advised.

By: Victor Aguilar

That feeling I knew,

saying, “I should've flew.”

Instead, here, I stayed.

I saw what you made.

This was never meant to be,

and that is okay with me.

I have been through this before.

The feeling of a heart torn.

For whatever reason why,

age difference may apply.

It may be our own problems,

Or the lack of solving them.

For whatever reason why,

you gave me the wings to fly.

I’ll fly away for awhile,

settle down and learn to smile.

If all this was meant to be?

I will fly back, you will see.

In the meantime, without end,

I will always be your friend.

Brittle air breathes, in and out, cracked.

Subtle music breathes in and out, exact.

From the beginning, a forest.

In the end, a chorus.

Trees of time lotion a ticking breeze.

Instruments of change warrant a thirsty ease.

A showering rain germinates rooting growth.

A relaxing orchestra, medicines a tempered loath.

Falling leaves; speeding formality.

Songs play falling fatality.

Branches fell to the laws of gravity.

Sounds traveling gain velocity.

Trunks of roots that hold the pounds.

Cases of reeds that make the sounds.

The bigger the trunk, the longer the history.

The thicker the reed, the louder the symphony.

Wooden staffs block the course.

Brass walls march with remorse.

A tall monument cut down today.

A focused embouchure blew away.

A barren land; a forest dead.

A melody plays; a tear shed.

Brittle air breathes, in and out, cracked.

Subtle music breathes in and out, exact.

Driving through this barrage of lights.

I see flashes and streams alike.

I see them moving fast.

I see myself lost in them.

Forgotten choices, I have overcome.

A nomination, for what I haven’t begun.

These lights pass me by, going slow.

I signal and pass, to move forward, at last.

Going South.

Lights, going faster in the opposite direction.

Never seen a second time.

I continue South, looking behind.

Lights that shown, telling me I am right,

disappeared when I left them.

I pull over rethinking my choices.

Do I move onward or backward?

Do I continue going South?

Do I turn around?

I look up at what is in front of me.

I see where I am going.

I see, my pointed lights.

I see, pavement faded.

I see the lines to follow.

I look behind me.

I see darkness but not emptiness.

I see, the path taken, no longer lit.

I see, the places that took part of me.

As I see my options.

Either way,

I continue a worn path.

Glass, and metal soiled.

To spite a failed revenge.

Crying, with metal tears,

into your obsidian hands.

Unknowing of the damage.

You helped with obsidian hands,

because obsidian doesn’t break.

Until, it breaks when I grab.

It cuts, as I drop the pieces.

Another obstacle you put between us.

Your shattered hands, scattered.

Metal tears harden as they fall.

I walk barefoot,

over glass and metal.

Too damaged,

to feel the pain.

By: Victor Aguilar

You desired emancipation,

your audibly clear proclamation.

To purge me and liquidate it.

I avowed you that, I'd admit.

Seas of Sloth waged in wishy-washy conjecture.

Floods of Gluttony ravaged your infrastructure.

To purge; is to deteriorate, corrode, and neglect.

My ship sailed atonement, condolences, then I forget.

By: Victor Aguilar

Done, you see, the last time, I swear.

My vows to you are short if you care.

I had them written; yes, I'm prepared.

I had made changes rather un-faired.

Tell me that you're a one-ride kind of soul.

That is our last stop time to; "Tally Ho."

I promise from here and onto forever.

I will not: love, hate, or care for you, never.

I persevered, made it through this troubling time.

But incredulous and suspicious did rhyme.

I took you on a wild magic carpet ride.

I showed you a shinning shimmering time.

I tried.

Looking steady. "Oh, you left already."

By: Victor Aguilar

These scars you left me with are here to stay.

For now, forever, for every bad day.

I don't want to feel this pain, no longer.

"I don't know why you try?" "I'm a goner."

"I don't want you back." "Get it through your head."

You lost the privilege to sleep in my bed.

Believe, and trust, or find a way.

Help yourself when he moves away.

When, if, I promise I don't hope.

He breaks your heart, your trust, don't mope.

"Find a way!" "Move on!" "Get a grip!"

Remember those lines in your script?

Do you understand what I'm saying?

When you're sitting there, decaying.

You'll message writing. "I'm sorry" or; "Hey."

Although, I'll be busy that day.

"I'm sorry, Bud." "I don't know where to start, old friend."

Knowing, it's indubitably your fault again.

When it happens to you, trust me, I can't, I won't;

give you advice. I'll say: "He doesn't want you." "He don't."

"He wants his future." "Never wanted your presence."

Losing your friend in a circumstance of seconds.

By: Victor Aguilar

My something.

Your nothing.

Performing.

Responding.

You Were always right? "Right?"

That's why we always fight?

You could never be wrong,

was your favorite song.

You're pathetic, lethargic,

Undetermined, lacking logic.

We were arguing, fighting,

now paragraphs I'm scribing.

Guess I couldn't help but fight with you.

That's another day wasted on you.

I'm done with this rehearsal of shame.

Time to star in the Theater of Pain.

"Goodbye?" "Forever?" Piteous? "Never."

Numbers change, transformation severed.

Why is Yin and Yang so cruel to us,

as, to put this false awareness of balance

when there isn’t one?

Like, how dare they, make me think,

I, need someone, to come into my life,

to tell me all the things wrong,

so I can realize them myself#period

How dare they, make me into this being

of such unbalanced feuding;

that I question the deifications of these words.

How dare they make a world, so addictive and euphoric

you only feel once but to yearn for it again,

that you put these walls and borders up

to shut out the people they intended

for you bring into your life;

so you, yes you, can learn the words:

My biggest weakness is.

Only to fall short of this great mystery to yourself;

but because these two unbalances

balance each other the world revolves as such!