I can't sleep

I haven't been able to sleep

for six

seven months now

so long I've lost track.

I used to lay in bed

frozen stiff with anxiety

that ungrips out of sheer exhaustion

just briefly

at dawn.

I went to a doctor

who told me

staying in bed without sleeping

exacerbates the problem

he said get up

read a book, write a poem

and sleep would come upon me

all on its own.

It did not happen that way.

So each night

I sit alone in my nightshirt

and watch today become yesterday

tommorow today

and still

I can't sleep.

It has been said

you can never be

too rich

or

too thin

actually both will kill you

just not in the same way

so I find myself

looking toward abundance

just my one small cup

running over

with just enough

to remove want from myself

and perhaps

a bit more to help out someone else.

I, a simple shopkeeper

selling my wares

in a brick and mortar storefront

bought and paid for with sweat and tears

but now

you come

each night

and burn me down

loot my wares

and call me names for my existence.

You, who come in numbers too great to fight

come to destroy even when there is nothing left

you can take from me

demanding too my silence

taking also

my right

to scream

bloody murder.