Barbie Syndrome

People all over the world are plagued by the same inner voice exclaiming, "you are not good enough as you are." A lack of self-love has manifested itself into a fixation with Barbie and Ken-like effigies that purport to tell us how we should conform.The journey to healing and self-actualization start with a balanced emphasis on self-love and regular affirmations. Here is my story:

They call me “Barbie,”

So I call them assholes!

I do not walk, talk, or gawk for you

I will not suck, fuck, or duck from you

I am your

Nothing

Because you insist on treating me as your anything

Leaving me to feel a bit like everything

And yet something that you would just throw away on a whim

Someone better call God.

That's right the big toymaker in the sky

And let him know that his stereotypical action figure male dolls have grown

Defective.

I guess the quality control guardian angels weren't too selective

When they created such broad shoulders

For such a tiny perspective

Let's make this respective

Yes,

I go to school

Mechanical Engineering

No,

I've never considered modeling

Yes,

I do aspire to flow like Nikki one day

No,

Not Minaj

Like Giovanni!

Because I am a poet

NOT a Barbie.

I mean check the jacket on the notebook

That's how sick my poems get

Guess you could say I ego trip too

Because I insist on speaking in hymns

Because I was blessed lyrically

Through my mother umbilically

Who prayed spiritually for my success

So YES!

I do have the voice that parts seas

My legs do resemble the stalks of the amazon tress

My features were hand chosen to hand the chosen with my regalness

I'm here to remind mortals that Barbies bleed too

And no,

Not just 4 to 6 days a month

We bleed for you

As you divide our thighs and color-code worth

Melancholy in my melanin

Stripped from feeling feminine

I have become an inanimate-human

Because I did not object to being objectified

Dissent to being desensitized

To the pain that other little Barbies must realize

Like,

Let me Mattel you something

--I am Battered Barbie

My accessories include narcissism and extreme self- consciousness

Often,

I am unsure which is worse.

Because I stress that everyone is looking at me

But I obsess that you can only see me for my flaws

My line is then recalled and I'm followed by hundreds of black-skinned girls who recall

Why they want to look like me

And I’m like

"Baby Girl, I don't even look like me!"

Minus my European disguise

The make-up on my eyes

The smallness of my thighs

The padded bra to help me go up half a fucking cup size

Cause really my chest is just fun-size

But who said that Barbies needed to come in one size?!

And once I realize

That Black Barbie Dolls have all White features

So no,

Buying Dark Skinned Barbie

Will not solve the sick cyclical cycle that we have created

You must look at your daughters, wives and friends who are now jaded

Tell them they are Queens

And beg them to sees it

Let them know pride is within our reach

It was never between our thighs

If she stretched out she would seize it

Wounded dolls with pussies like broken records

Fix yourself before you let them play you

They call me “Barbie.”

And I reply,

"I just wanted to be held in a non-sexual context

It sucks feeling like the ugliest doll at the bottom of a forgotten toy box.

I just wanted to be held

Dammit.

I promise,

I just wanted to be

Loved

Enough

So I could

Actually

Love myself

Too.