Not I

In a universe parallel

I would be an infidel

Someone who cannot spell

Yet loves to ride a carousel

Or a proper southern belle

In a mansion I would dwell

Thinking everything is swell

A 50’s pin-up bombshell

Without a single fat cell

A gal who’d never yell

But is always raising hell

A soldier in a drug cartel

Occupying a prison cell

With a doctorate from Cornell

Perhaps Harvard as well

Displaying my Prizes Nobel