Bobby pins

I refuse to believe that "I lost" 

a negative connotation should not exist

for the long night that you held me

to thaw all the frost.

I lose plenty of things 

my bobby pins line up the streets

to leave me alone

as if they had wings.

The first time was not a regret,

 I gained so much more

 it was a precious moment 

 I'm unlikely to forget.

 The feeling of being held by a loved one 

 to love a body other than your own

 only to discover that previous uncertainty

 has diminished to none.

Tell me I have lost and I'll tell you I have gained

my innocence did not die away 

The gasps, the moans, the caresses 

are in my memory stained. 

If I lose my lover I will have gained 

the undeniable knowledge

that my body is power, 

not to be taken in vain. 

If I'm not shamed for losing my bobby pins

those objects that I lose so carelessly

then my first time should not be named

as one of my reckless sins.