Why the fuck am I like this. Why tonight! Why right now! I'm fucking done. I'm tired of being the only one who tries. God I don't know what to do anymore. It feels like I'm going to explode. I'm screaming inside but in reality I can't even speak. What the fuck is wrong with me! God give me strength to live this life or take life from me. I cannot be living like this anymore. This isn't really even living. I am in a shadow existence. Fucking help. I can't do this on my own. I'm not okay anymore.