And Then, I Awoke

And then I felt my soul crumble,

The pain was worse than the shatter

of my heart,

But no one told me

that a war within yourself

breaks your bruises from within,

so I'm learning to stretch

before I look in the mirror

because it takes preparation

to avoid cutting the sinew

that holds me together.

it's in my nature to resist.

and my will breaks as an act

of defiance.

if I could turn inside out,

you'd see evidence of the thrashing,

the maze of corrections and edits

I've drawn upon my soul.

we both know, my final draft

will be framed with a casket

and a crowd.

and I'll be perfect on that day,

when the mirror doesn't

see me look back,

when my wounds are covered

with flowers

and all my scars fade to bone,

and eulogies become,

an introduction,

to what I tried to be.