The Suicide Note

T.S Elliot once said this is the way the world ends not with a bang but a whimper. I suppose he know what he was talking about except my life has been full of whimpering and tears. My mom and dad divorced when I was 7 and mom we asked mom to remarry a nice rich guy with a boat. Well she got one thing right he had a boat. However he was the most jealous and meanest man I've ever met. I remember he took us fishing a few times but most of my memories of him were of being thrown up against a wall or told I'd never amount to anything. He never did this around mom of course. He was always very nice to her. As I grew my stepfather and I continued to argue and eventually I was forced to leave because of the stress this out on my mom. I love my mom very much and I hated seeing her suffer. Eventually my real father started having manic episodes and got into drugs which lead to suicide attempts. I trying to be a good son continued to stay by him even after everyone else left. It was difficult to hear my father call me some of the things he did. I tried to make my life better by going to classes but having to borrow money from my mother set my stepfather off again. I truly believe given the opportunity he's honestly murder me or at least cause me serious harm. So after a life of this madness could Hell be any worse maybe God will take pity on me. One things for sure though my step father was right I didn't make anything of myself.