Me as a Baby...Comletely Open-Ended...and Where It Takes Me

There are nine obvious holes in me

Nine liaisons with the universe

I hope to leave humanity

With nine, no more, in my hearse

There are two for catching drumbeats

Tympanically delivered

From a world of broken heartbeats

Before I'm umbilically scissored

Four holes I have are front and near

Two that breathe my share of air

Two are for leaking my salty tears

All on my face, arranged in pairs

There's one that comes with taste and suction

Where both my needs and wants will meet

With compensatory eruption

When overindulging the Great Teat

There's one ending vermiform

Between my legs--who knew?

When it grows up, it'll fusiform

And corkscrew more holey people, too

One hole that's truly splendid

Alleged to be a one-way street

Doth render me truly open-ended

Without it, obstructed and incomplete

Extra holes are dangerous

They bleed or gape or drain

Bodily fluids that raise a fuss

'Cause you won't get 'em back again