Waltz

Bright glowy roller skates strapped to her feet.

And it's too late to bring myself to slide on up beside him skating on the same path I am but using a longboard to get along this stretch of sidewalk that goes for miles on end while I just keep on going and pretend that I don't feel that laser eye look of attraction that penetrates my back, but this one isn't just watching my ass this time and it feels so nice that I want to slow my roller skate feet down just a tad to at least let that silly boy know that I saw him too and I was looking at his shoes that told their own story of what sort of adventures they'd gone on strapped to wherever he took them to and made me want to be strapped to him too.

But she's not slowing her roll and the kick and push of these worn out beater shoes I can't seem to get rid of scuff the concrete again with another kick so I can see if that smile on her face was actually a grin at me but keeping up with a roller blading beauty fading over the next hill is a good reminder of why I should stop smoking while I daydream outside since most of my time is spent doing such things while I wait around for life to happen and write nothing but poems for who I know is waiting just beyond the horizon.

So when I feel that stare has faded from my back I turn around to see that he's fallen behind again and wonder if he actually does this every day like I do or if he's just here again because he saw me yesterday and wants to talk as much as I do but can't seem to keep up because I’m here to exercise off the weight off my shoulders so I can be stronger the next time fate says it's time to pay your dues again sweetie and I cant pretend that the reason I haven't slowed down to see if he’s into me for reasons that I wouldn't believe is because I’m not ready and I haven't finished my training and the bags that I drag behind me must be visible still so why even bother because I'm probably just looking at him through my rose-tinted prescription spectacles that I can't take off or everything would be harder to see.

Another day on the path and I’m just skating up and down all day so I can catch a glimpse of her again but after a few hours I stop and go back to the tree we used to sit under so I can reminisce about times that don’t matter anymore before I go back to waiting for a stranger on a public path and realize how stupid it is to try to believe in spontaneous romance with the girl I just watched skate by on those fluorescent roller skates she must’ve bought directly from the eighties or something then go home to pretend that what I just did this last week wasn’t something similar to stalking.

Another day without him here makes it creep back in, the fear and confirmation that what I had in my head was just a rumination of past lies people told me since I read them wrong and couldn’t see past my own clouded senses again so I’ll just keep skating all this fate weight off and blur out anybody else I see from here on out in my memory.