I wish I knew you were hurting

Seeing you laying at deaths door

Just a tiny shell of the person used to be

What happened inside that made you give up on the outside

How could we have been there more for you

How could I have played a part in helping you stay

I wish I knew you were hurting

Everyone hurts and is going through something in this world

Some hurting more than others

Some feel hurt over little things that we make big

I myself can admit that I have been guilty of that

Some make small of Big problems

Because they don't want others to be able to see their pain

They smile and pretend that life is great for them

And sometimes treat real life like social media by only showing others the happy pictures and rarely revealing the painful moments they encounter

Did you think your burdens were too much for us to carry

I wish I knew you were hurting

I wish I knew to tell you how much and how powerfully you are loved by so many

I wish I could have told you how much you as a person provided impact in so many lives

You were so much more special than you knew

Your heart on your sleeve

Your kindness and humor

Your great love for your son

You found joy in holiday events around the city

Your sunglasses were your best friend

but then again so were taking pictures

and memorializing good times with great friends

Now sadly we all have to say our goodbyes

But we get to hold on to our happiest memories of you

I don't want to hold on to the pain

I wish I knew you were hurting

We wish we could have been there for you

To encourage you to keep fighting

To keep spreading that beautiful spirit of joy among other people

We are now all hurting

When we see and smell fresh Eucalyptus we will think of you

When lavender blooms each season or appears in a bouquet of flowers we will think of you

Whenever we see a bamboo tree

Or fresh grill marks on a healthy meal

And whenever a fresh new Jordan hits the market place

We will think of you

I hope you're no longer hurting

I hope you no longer feel any pain or heartache

You are now at peace

The angels will comfort you and dry your tears

Rest in heaven dear friend, dear mom, dear sister, dear daughter

And know our love for you is internal .

Written by Dereasa Daniels

In Loving memory of Nova ❤️