Annoying Relatives

When weights are outlawed,

Only laws will be outweighed

Only outs will weigh in

When there are weighs to a means

Where's there's a way

There's a means

Cause and effect are overrated

Cause is overstated

Effect is unaffected

If you can't get there from here, stay

If they can't get here from there, wait for them

Demographics equilibrate and entropy wins

When the going gets shitty

The shitty get going

Good riddance

Unreasonable people

Have no reason to people

Reasonable worlds

Fortunate people

With fortunes, unfortunately

Forthrightly command unreasonably

When the reasonable disagree with you

And the unreasonable agree with you

Maybe the reason is you

If you can dream it

You can do it

Avoid the nightmares

When life gives you lemons

Reach for the sublimes

Spit out the seeds

If discomfort gives you comfort

Like nipple rings and gimp balls

Find comfort in unemployment

If you can't win for losing

Nor lose all your winnings

Consider the dice

If going the distance

Means others pass you by

Your mileage may vary

If you can call a kettle black

And see the forest for the trees

Open your eyes

If your crime doesn't pay

Try mine for a day

It does

Relatives are commutative

When all things being equal

Tilts the world against you