Hope is Every Feeling at Once

Hope is a feeling of trust.

That's one of the main definitions of hope, anyway.

But hope could also mean looking forward to waking up the next day

even though tomorrow isn't always promised

and even though there will always be a voice in the back of my head, whispering out, Thank God tomorrow isn't always promised.

Hope could also mean wanting to crawl out of your darkness

after years and decades of being trapped without a dim light

after years of fear holding you back from searching

for a way out

Hope doesn't always have to mean being optimistic all the time.

Hope can also have uncertainly between the lines.

Maybe you might be uncertain about the future.

And yet - you stay hopeful because you want things to end with a happy ending

but really, that happy ending isn't guaranteed all the time.

Hope is feeling upbeat.

Hope is feeling bittersweet.

Hope is feeling like there is a way out.

Hope is no longer feeling alone.

Hope is after feeling hopeless.

Hope is realization

knowing that things

wouldn't be so bad after all.

because at the end of the day,

it will end.

Hope may also have melancholic aspects.

Hope may drive you to hopelessness again.

Hope may get you stuck back into the deserted island.

Hope may drive you to an endless loop, with no shortcuts.

Hope isn't a linear graph.

Hope has its ups and its down, and its loops, like a rollercoaster.

Hope may make you realize that you've been circling in the same path and it would be up to you to get out of it.

And hope could make you desire new beginnings

despite all the damage left behind.

Hope is building a garden for yourself to attract butterflies.

Hope is desiring for butterflies to come to your garden.

But when the butterflies don't show up in your garden,

hopelessness spirals around.

But that didn't matter.

because at least you have a beautiful garden.

Hope is catching fireflies in a jar,

but resentment catches you first

because the fireflies wouldn't budge to trap itself inside.

and after you end up with only one firefly in a jar

jealous rushes over your body.

everyone else had at least five or more.

but you still smiled, regardless

because at least you caught one firefly.

it still gave you a little bit of hope to catch more.

Maybe hope isn't always how people imagine it

maybe hope isn't always permanent

maybe hope won't be forever

but at the end of the day

Hope is every feeling at once.

And hope will eventually chase you to the light.

one day.