10. Arms Like Anchors

I always said "we" in reassurance

As if there were inhabitants,

Or an ever-peering audience

I guess I half-suspected

You were witnessing and listening

To me discover every puzzle piece

Now I see; it's about time we meet

After all those days in retrograde

It feels nice to be spinning straight

I am sure you're, too, enthused

But as we exit from those traveled years

Where do you suggest we go from here?

You always said I wasn't worth it

All the work I spent building our core

Would always at least an atom short

And all the seeds I delicately planted

May as well just wilt away

(They'll never reflect the light of day)

And to think! I was believing

That smug fog on my inner lens

You breathed to occlude-

-Hey, may I interject? You seem stressed

Your muscles feel all tight and tense

So I'll suggest to you that you should stretch

Bend at the waist

Lower our arms

Use them as weights

So here I rest as I'm encompassed

In the warmth of friends from far away

And light bleeding from the window pane

I gaze at the path behind me

It looks so much greener than

The earth I first traversed and tracked

And all the songs I chose to sing

Are still heard swelling endlessly,

Still enchanting with their melodies

And I feel whole; and only half afraid

So you ungrateful, incessant pest,

It's my turn to speak, you may not interject!

Your arms dragged us through the sand

Then you jammed us in that trench,

Ashamed of your insignificance

I promise you I've shown you my best

And although I've lived this long,

I'm not done living quite yet

I don't think I am something

That the sun will eclipse

When I'm hidden behind walls

Constructed by others' wrists

And I don't think I am clever

I'm just a voice that retorts

As I'm swallowed by the flood

And the waves that I ignore

When I left the attic empty-handed

I shook all my dreams awake

All my joints have cracked and rusted

There's no use to run away

As dusk rears its head

On its long body of night

It's abundantly clear soon

There will be no more lights

So I wish I had your answers

Or had some advice to give

But how could I impart wisdom

When I don't even know how long I've got to live?