Search For my Elan

Lost within myself, I seek to recapture

That spirit, who dances, taunting, twirling

Around the roaring fire in which burns my soul.

She dances, beckoning, her movements pure grace

Tongues of flame reflecting in her eyes.

Her gaze sees, as if through me, as she extends her hands

The pulse of life beating with her every move.

"Come! Seek that which you have lost!" She says, but in silence

Speaking to me in words no one can hear, though we are alone.

Closing her eyes, she lifts her arms to the heavens as

In my mind, again, she speaks, "I am your Elan!"

"You and I are one! What I am, you will be again.

FEEL the rhythm of your soul, burn with the depth of your desire

Beseech the gods for what you seek

Yearn and reach, for your soul, into the fire!"

She extends her hand to me, in invitation to rise and dance

In fear, I pull back, feeling the heat of the flames

Opening my eyes, I look through them and see

Through my tears, my soul, gazing back at me.

The reflection of which, as though a mirror seen

Not if who I am, but if who I can be, and of who I have been

Should I only have the courage to reach out and brave

The flames of my own doubt and uncertainty.

Taking a deep breath, I rise, and..overcoming my fear,

I step into the midst of the fire, burning with a heat

That is cold, I claim again my soul which was lost,

Gathering my spirit into myself, I rejoice

And realize it was all worth the cost

For in those flames, was forged a strength that can hold

Through any adversity, strife, suffering or cold

I look out of the flames, but can no longer see

That Spirit; my Elan, is again one, now whole, in me.