Illusions.

It's an addiction that I never thought was possible. I yearn for it the most when everything seems to be out of my control.

My vision blurs as my chest burns and breathing seems impossible. One, two, five, six movements from my hand and the crimson gives me the illusion that I'm in control again.

The numbness kicks in and the burning, blurring pain is gone.

I can breath.

But it's all an illusion...