Projection

It’s hard to see that the people you adore and cherish are sometimes not likable. I often forget that people are not just one character. Some friends can be good friends, but bad co-worker. A mother can be a good mother but also a bad wife. A father can be a good leader but a bad father. A teacher could be a good teacher but also a bad friend. And what’s cruel is that, most of the time their dislikable characters are what often sticks the most. I am a victim of this, and I started disliking some of my friends, friends that are really good friends but just so unprofessional. My father, who has worked hard, who’s been a very good employee, such a hard worker, and a good leader; but I hate his emotional immaturity. My mother sacrificed everything for her family, but I dislike how unsubstantial her character is, no life, just endless scrolling on the internet most of the time for nothing.

In the world where counting red flags is a scale to crucify someone, it is hard to actually see what makes a person a good person and a bad person.

But then again, what does all of this have to do with me? So what if I don’t like some of their characters as a person. They weren’t born only for me. I guess this is my projection. I always say, every negative thing we say to people is an unconscious projection of how we see ourselves. When will I accept that I will never be perfect? That I do not need to please people, not even my friends, not even my family. When will I accept that it won’t matter how many mistakes I will make in this lifetime. When will I accept that I am a human, and I’m meant to make mistakes, and say the wrong things. And when will I learn to forgive myself in order to forgive those people that I like whenever their character disappoints me?