Allen

He's been sleeping in my bed for the last 8 years.

When my husband is away, I let him come over.

I let him into my bed. I wrap my legs around him to forget I'm alone at night.

I lean into him. He holds me upright.

His caress is soft and he smells like clean linen... and me- much better than my husband does.

He gets tired every now and again. His caress grows unnatural, lumpy, rude.

I kick him out and I sleep alone.

And if he's gone long enough, I start to think I might be able to live without him.

But then my husband comes home

and I get the sweet relief of leaning into someone again...

So I bring him back into my bed.

Or maybe I just replace him entirely.

For someone bigger, better, softer.

I hold him and he holds me.

Allen. My darling. My body pillow.