for people who have written about grief...

hi fellow writers! it has been a long time since i've hopped on the prose. i've been having some difficult block... i lost a lover so unexpectedly last summer and i so badly need to write about it. i want to tell our story so so so badly and i simply don't know where to begin. every time i try, i end up feeling stuck or disappointed that i'm not honoring him or myself in the right way. SO here i am asking for any advice on how to begin! where to begin! anything helps xoxo