Scissors

In my fantasy, I will buy scissors. So many pairs, perhaps a wheelbarrow full of them. A vanload? Way more scissors than any person has ever owned.

In every cupboard, in every drawer and on every surface in my house, you will find at least one pair of scissors. There will be scissors hanging from the walls, scissors hanging from the ceiling. Anywhere you look in any room, you will see scissors...

Then I wait.

I know The Moment won’t present itself immediately. It could take days, weeks even. But when The Moment arrives, oh boy, I’m ready.

Whatever it is, an envelope, a bag of candy, a dangling string… On that day I simply reach out and grab me a pair of scissors. It will be beautiful.

Surely they can’t all have vanished?

#irony #sarcasm #sardonic #everydayproblems