Chemicals

Some days I feel like a damn god.

Confident, outspoken and funny

Living life so hard

I feel like every single person is a great friend

Life is fucking great

This happiness will never end

For at least a week

I feel like I could rule the world

Every person loves me

Theys, guys and girls

I know I deserve greatness

And I should do whatever I want

I don't think about consequences

I don't consider the future harms

I'm living life to the fullest

And I give the best advice

Deciding to change my hair again

To match my beautiful eyes

Feeling kinda risky

Because a gamble could be fun

Making massive choices on a flip of a coin

The decision making done

I don't listen to your problems well

Even though I try

Because your words are not sticking

Mixed music playing loud in my mind

Dangerous social butterfly

I make friends of those I meet

But around day 8

Everything changed

And I'm drowning in defeat

I must have annoyed everyone

Gotten on their nerves

I'm going to be completely alone

And it's everything I deserve

I regret so many choices

Guilt swarms in my head

All the actions I made

All the wrong words I said

I hate the way I look

How could anybody like me

I'm boring, ugly and miserable

If I weren't here they'd be free

Tears fill my eyes often

I'm constantly worn and sad

It takes me a while to realise

I'm really not that bad

At some point my calm hits and I stop feeling so cynical

After all, it's just the chemicals.