a promise of perfection - verdict: fail

promise #1: i'll be the best daughter you could have asked for.

perfect grades

sleepless nights, falling onto a tearstained pillow

fake smiles, frigid stares, feared and dreaded disappointment

bad decisions, a perfect record, lies lies lies

verdict: fail

promise #2: i'll stay with you forever

happy beginnings and hopeful first dates

discussions of a future years ahead, already in the making

open conversation curling in on itself

forgetting who you are and who you want to be

arguments and frustration and the inability to accept reality

bad decisions, perfected smiles, blank eyes, lies lies lies

verdict: fail

promise #3: i'll have my life figured out and planned like you wanted

goals and dreams and ambition

late nights mapping out your life

feeling like its actually someone else's

finding things you love and hiding them

shame and worry and fear and lies lies lies

perfectly planned agendas open and unchecked

finding solace in what does not fit in the plan of a life that's not yours

finally escaping, trying to figure out who you are

who are you?

verdict: fail

promise #4: i'll love only who the world thinks i should love

going out with a boy

laughter and jokes and what could have been love

overthinking, overcompensating, overwhelming

perfect presentation of a picturesque relationship

fighting, avoiding your thoughts, avoiding his body

leaving

being both ashamed and so so relieved

her, in the back of the car

faceless, and yet so so much more right

puzzle pieces properly in place

going back to perfectly pretending

lies lies lies

verdict: fail

promise #5: i'll be perfect

verdict: fail