I ran toward you for so long

But I was running blind

Searching for something special

But it was only in my mind

I used "us" as a refuge

Instead of looking deep within

I felt that I was not enough

But that thought was the sin

I ran toward the artifice

I thought I’d claimed the prize

But a straw suit’s for a hollow man

And this one’s not my size

Your embrace was not the paradise

Curated in my head

This space was just another place

The hunger wasn’t fed

I realized that this was not

the succor that I sought

And wounded, dragged myself back up

To fight the care I’d bought

The purchase of a poisoned mind

Dry rotting from the lies

I had to scrape the dead weight out,

Allow myself to rise

I see now I didn’t need to run

I’ve already won the race

The thing that I’ve been looking for

Is not ANOTHER place

The piece that has been missing

Has been with me all along

It is a place within me

Not something for which to long

Because longing isn’t living

And fantasies aren’t real

And now my eyes are open,

I can really start to heal

Breathe life into my passions

And not pour into the past

My soul in all its fractions

Will be my chief repast

We only get this one life

And mine is very blessed

I will focus on the special things

That being me joy and rest

I’ll stop chasing the mirage now

That will always creep away

I’m standing up to take a bow

And doing this my way

And my way is a good way

With so many sites to see

New pleasures to discover

Celebrating being free

Free from this prison of my mind

Stepping out into the light

For now, my eyes have finally found

An authentic guiding light

I will live inside my womanhood

And cherish she within

And give away my girlish dreams

For they have worn too thin

To sustain my full-grown soul

And everything that’s me

I’ll run toward myself this time

Together we’ll be free