Again

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

I'm sitting on my bed crying about a friend

About many friends that wished they were dead

Sitting there wishing I could take it away

You told me I couldn't save everyone

And I still think about it to this day

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

Remember when my friend died? That was the most shocking thing that happened to me in that moment of my life

And I was plummeted into a depression I didn't know existed inside me

I know you did the best you could

But why did you have to say I needed to get over it

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

It's like when my old boyfriend broke up with me because I was sad

So I was sad like any normal teen would be

And you asked if you should get me help

But your tone was excited and angry

The way you sounded most of my life

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

I'm not sure I want you to hear me

But I hear about the comfort people get from their mothers

And wonder why it was so hard for me to feel that

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

Your mom just died and I can't be as sad as you want me to be

But I was pretty torn up inside

Why was that the only time you decided to point out my sadness?

As if my sadness was only convenient when you wanted it to be

At the worst possible time

When it was too late

Mom I'm sad again but you can't hear me

And you'll never really hear me

I guess that's just the way it is