Lump in my throat

They're just words,

I tell myself as I write furiously in the black book

They're just words,

I tell myself as I run from the boys who call me ugly and the girls who call me a prude

They're just words,

I tell myself when I hear my parents scream at each other in the night

They're just words,

I tell myself as I try to tell you how I feel about you and fail

They're just words,

I say as I lay down and asphyxiate myself with this enormous lump I kept in my throat