Put Your Lips First

Phew! It’s warm in here, but I can feel my edges start to cool and harden softly, filling up the space around me till I’m snug inside the darkness.

We shake and shutter, me and the others, as we’re jostled roughly into place, bouncing and bobbing along until the movement stops and the noise grows loud around us. I hear the bells chime on and off and the sounds of footsteps, heavy talking. The others disappear around me, but you pick me up and take me home with you in the end. 

With a loud pop, the light comes in, and in the blinding brightness, I can see you - the face of God. You hover bright before me, and rub me lightly across the smoothest portion of your heavenly face. I am touched by God, warm and dazzled in your light. 

But you flee from me, and before I know it I am swathed again in darkness, nestled back into nothing. 

But it’s warm here now. I am nestled and wrapped in the warm of your miraculous and heavenly hands, swaying gently with your godly movements. I am lulled into a sense of comfort, peace at your mercy. And before I know it, you are revealed before me again, shining in that dazzling light, pressing my soul sweetly to your own before casting me away again - exiling me from your grace and warmth. 

And then you are gone from me forever. The noise grows loud and a stink of fermentation fills the air. I see your face before, for one tiny moment, and see that there is only darkness about you now, little bursts of flashing light about your head like some cosmic halo. 

I feel your warmth again, but it is different, somehow changed. You are not the God you once were, and your warmth is stinking, sticky and hot. 

You cast me into darkness and I feel the world shutter and jostle about me. I feel the stinking, tepid warmth filling in around me. I picture your face, wrapped in that first, explosive glow, and think of the glory of your touch. I think of your face, as the press comes down around me and I am flattened beneath the heaviness of your abandonment and the other, careless gods like you. 

Your death is silky smooth.