Among Us

Ok. I do not expect this to win, and I do not expect this to be very funny, but it was funny to me so shut up.

Yesterday my brother introduced me to this new game called Among Us. I don’t usually play video games, but this one seemed interesting. Basically, it’s a murder mystery. You and your friends are on a spaceship, doing various tasks to keep it running. Meanwhile one (or sometimes two) people are secretly working against you, murdering people and sabotaging the ship. If you come across a murdered person you can report it, in which case everybody goes to the meeting room to figure out who did it. There is a period of discussion, followed by a vote. The person voted off... dies.

I join the game. There are a bunch of my brother’s friends who I don’t know. The screen comes up - I am a murderer.

*well this should be interesting*

I have no idea what I’m supposed to do, so I walk into the first random room I see. There is no one around but my brother.

*look around, no one there, stab brother*

The one game rule that I actually know is that the murderer can make use of vents in the floor to move around undetected. There happened to be a vent right next to me.

*hop in vent. Upstairs, brother extremely annoyed*

Once in the vent, I didn’t know how to exit so I clicked random things until I managed to find the nearest vent and get out.

*coast clear, nobody saw*

Now remember, I have no idea where anything is.

*head right, for absolutely no reason. Enter room*

I look around, and I see my brother’s dead body. I ran directly to the place I had just so masterfully escaped. I enter full panic mode at this point, because at any moment someone could enter the room and see me standing over a dead body and not reporting it.

*report the body that I just killed*

“you guys, I just found a dead body and I am so scared, I have no idea what’s going on, I just clicked this button and now we’re in a meeting room, what’s happening?”

*all of my brother’s friends being condescending about my lack of knowledge*

Long story short, nobody suspected me and I won, despite having escaped the murder scene and then walked right back in.

10/10 play