Sveiki? Anyone?

If anyone could please tell me how to write in the English language, please leave me a comment. I am Lithuanian and have never left my country. I only speak the Baltic language, but my neighbors once had some family from Russia over to their house, and I heard them speaking, I do believe, what may have been the Russian language.

Anyway, I’d love to expand my horizons and leave Lithuania, then someday learn a new language. I have studied that English is a very popular thing in many places and maybe, one fair and magical day, I will be able to communicate in this popular English I have read much about.

I am fully aware that this whole post is moot, as there is no way that I can express myself to all of you people in this strange English. I only have a box of Lucky Charms to guide me. The cereal box washed up last night inside of a plastic bag on the shores of the sea. I read the entire nutritional panel many times, then extrapolated how to write what I am writing now. That is why there is no hope... No one could ever possibly understand this English trash that I try to write.

Atsisveikina!

- Danute Banyte