the universe is laughing at us

doesn't feel like the universe is laughing at us?

2020 started out as a year full of hope and now it's turned into a disaster

every month is something new - more cases more murders more invasive species more record breaking temperatures - we really can't seem to catch a break

school starts back up again soon and it feels strange

this summer hasn't felt like summer at all

the only constant is the heat and even that is more extreme than it has been in the past

the stress keeps piling up too and the anxiety

my school district sent an email today with plans for reopening this fall and as much as i want to be back in school i just don't see how it's all going to work out

i feel like people won't follow the rules

wearing a mask all day long will be so incredibly hard - my mom's an icu nurse taking care of covid positive patients and i don't know how she does it

and the plans they suggested all seem terrible to be honest

i just hope they pick the lesser of all of the evils

not that it'll be anything incredible

it feels like the world is on fire

at this point she could throw in a nuclear war and i wouldn't even be suprised

when kanye said he was running for president i just laughed

and then I thought about him and america and how at the rate this year is going, kanye being elected president would be one of the least surprising things to happen

and then everything on wtw it's honestly all to much

i write this on prose on my phone because my school computer (the only laptop i have availabile to me) blocked prose right after i made an account (thanks school admins) and so this is probably littered with grammar and spelling mistakes

i forgot how much i hate writing on my phone

everything that's happened so far just feels like the next event in a long stretch of time where we can do very little and everything is going wrong

it makes me feel to helpless

i wish we could make a difference

but at 16 i can't do much at all and adults don't think what i have to is valid anyway so what does it matter

this is more of a rant then any form of poetry at this point so i'm sorry

maybe i'll be able to write something coherent soon when i'm less upset

but aside from all that

it really does feel like the universe is laughing at us all